Going Native: LA

Clay Weiner, director, Biscuit Filmworks and OJ Simpson trial fan, suggests drinks with salty barflies, chowing on chili dogs and supping coconut water in the City of Collagen

What is the best thing about working in advertising in LA?

Everyone drinks coconut water cos there’s a drought.

What is the worst thing about working in advertising in LA?

You never know when there willl be an earthquake.

If you’re booking a hotel in LA where would you choose to stay?

On my dime? The motel above the old White Horse on Western. The White Horse was a bar that looked like a cross between where we held my 9-year-old birthday party and the green room of the Comedy Store. There’s a Super 8 motel above it that offers weekly and monthly rates. If you’re writing a script and need more characters this is where you should stay.

Where’s the best place to eat in LA?

Chili John’s, technically in Burbank.

Where’s the bestplace to drink in LA?

The HMS Bounty – it has better regulars than Cheers and the TVs are both a proper 17 inches. Chez Jay – they pour stiff ones and the staff are saltier than the Pacific. Magic Castle – because, duh, the magic. And, if you forget to bring a sports jacket you get to look fly in a borrowed Arfani.

Who do you/would you love to work with in the industry?

The two Genes: Wilder and Hackman. Recently, I tried to get both of them for a feature I’ve written and when I heard back that neither of them were doing well I cried.

If LA were a product what would it be?

Silicone, collagen, Restylane.

What do you miss when you’re out of the city?

When I’m in LA I miss NYC, when I’m in NYC I miss LA. It’s like that Neil Diamond song.

What advice would you give to a visitor?

Don’t take the subway.

What’s LA’s favourite pastime?

Used to be reading paperbacks at the beach. Now it’s txts in traffic.

One table, four places, you and who?

Steve Martin. Bill Murray. Sacha Baron Cohen.

What is the best US ad you have seen in the last year?

Old Spice Momsong. Moms singing like Meatloaf makes me weak in the knees. I like the strategy as much as the execution. And the lyrics are heartbreakingly emotional. If it were me, I think I would have gone more Steve Perry, Oh Sherrie or Linda Ronstadt, Long Long Time. Those are two of my own mom’s favourites.