A Day In The Life Of Tom Noakes

Ah, Sydney. A haven of sun, sand and surf where everyone spends their days chucking another shrimp on the barbie and catching the waves on Bondi beach, right?

Not Scoundrel director Tom Noakes. As his shots photo-journal reveals, a typical day Down Under is more about stalking the local barista, doorstepping his producer and taking life advice from religious zealots....

08.30: Alright. Day in the life of me. Morning walk to the studio!

09.00: Get my coffee around the corner from the studio. Tried to explain to the barista, Robin, why I was taking a photo of her but accidentally called her Ruby. Shit.

09.03-09.20: Robin asked me to stop taking photos of her. Stupid. Why Ruby? Touched some cacti.

09.32: Arrive at my studio. Alright. Time to work.

09.37: Check emails. No new emails. I wonder if I should go back and apologise to Robin.

10.00: Still no new emails. Call Adrian Shapiro, EP of Scoundrel. No answer.

11.00: Nips in a twist.

12.20: Still no emails. Lunch.

12.53-13.32: The haunt… Robin. Ruby. Ruby Rhod!

Chris Tucker’s portrayal of DJ Ruby Rhod in Luc Bessons’ The Fifth Element is his undisputed masterpiece. Not to diminish his quality contribution to the Rush Hour series. Korben Dallas, my man.

Still no emails. Must be a server problem.

14.12: Walk to Scoundrel. Something will be going on there. Passing by the coffee shop, I consider going back in to explain myself to Robin. Run away instead.